****I wrote this about a month after Minden was born. I wanted to try and write it while everything was still pretty fresh. I know it's a little late, but enjoy!****
Here I am one month after Minden’s birth finally sitting
down to write her birth story. After reading hundreds of other baby’s birth
stories I am about to type hers. It all feels so surreal. The excitement of finding out we were
expecting is still so fresh in my memory. To have her sleeping next to me as I
type this is almost more than my new mommy hormones can handle.
Nate and I knew we wanted a natural birth. Unfortunately, I
feel like I had a pretty skewed perspective of what natural birth meant. When I
thought too much about it; it made me feel nervous and weak. Was this something
that I would be physically and mentally strong enough to handle? I just
pictured myself lying in a hospital bed twisting and turning in state of pure
torture. I had never talked to anyone who had a natural birth. This made it
seem impossible to me.
Once we found out we were expecting; it was time to get
educated. We chose to use chiropractic, prenatal yoga, a doula and the Bradley
Method to achieve the natural birth we desired. Each one of these was so
instrumental in our birth story. As this was my first birth, I was not
completely comfortable with a home birth. I just felt there were too many
unknowns at the time. We decided to go with the midwives at the University of
Iowa Hospitals and clinics.
Up until the night before Minden’s birth I had felt such a
rush to get things done. We nearly had my “to-do” list complete. That is with
the exception of packing the bag for the hospital. We still had three weeks to
go, and in my head I was confident I would probably go closer to 42 weeks. I
was feeling tired and decided the bag could wait until next weekend. I remember
I even fell asleep earlier than usual that Sunday evening. At this point I had
been sleeping on the couch for a few weeks.
I woke up that Monday morning around 5:30 am and just felt
off. This wasn’t surprising as I had been fighting a head cold for a few days.
I got up and headed to the bathroom. It was in there that I started to notice
that it felt like I was constantly peeing. I went and woke Nate to tell him. I
knew that at this point in my pregnancy it was completely possible to pee
yourself. The fluid was clear, and I wasn’t too concerned. I told Nate I still
just wasn’t feeling that well and wanted to take the morning off from work.
However, the fluid continued to leak and I began to worry as
my due date was still over three weeks away. I decided I would call the labor
and delivery nurse. She told me to lie down on my side for one hour and see if
the fluid pooled and then gushed out when I stood up.
After only laying for 20 minutes I could feel the fluid
still leaking and I started to have low back pains. My stomach then began to
cramp and I rushed to the bathroom. As we had learned in our classes it is normal
for your body to flush itself before labor. At this point I decided I would
call the nurse again. She told me that she would talk to the midwife and call
me back.
Nate left for work at this point. I wasn’t sure if I was
experiencing labor, had eaten something bad or possibly had the flu. I remember
him kissing me goodbye as I was on the floor on all fours bearing through what
I thought was a cramp. I kept saying over and over that I didn’t want to be the
lady who thought she was in labor and wasn’t. I just kept picturing I would get
to labor and delivery, they would take one look at me, tell me I wasn’t in
labor and I would have to walk out of there hanging my head in shame.
For the next hour I moved around the house never really
sitting. The pains would come and go. I never looked at the clock to see if
they were regular or how long they were lasting. I was just focused on getting
through it one contraction at a time, or cramp at a time as I thought. The pain
would start in my low back then wrap around the front. I walked from room to
room resting on counters and squatting by the couch.
It was now 9:30 am and an hour had passed with no call back
from the hospital. The pain was getting more intense and I couldn’t wait any
longer for an answer. I called the nurse and she apologized as she thought
someone had called me back. She transferred me to the midwife. I explained what
I had experienced, and she recommended that I come in and get checked out. I
later found out that because of the shift change there was a miscommunication
between the midwives regarding who would call me, and that is why I had not
heard from them.
I called Nate around 9:45 am and explained to him that they
wanted to see me. He said he was expecting a patient at 10:30 am. He asked if I
would mind driving to the clinic, getting adjusted and then we could head to
the hospital. Realizing that he had no idea how intense the pain had gotten, I
let him know that he just needed to get home as soon as possible.
On the way to the hospital I tossed and turned in the back
seat. I kept repeating to Nate that I didn’t want to be the lady who went in
for false labor. He said that during the car ride was when he became convinced
I might be in labor. I remember him asking me if it felt like what I thought a
contraction would feel like. I replied that I didn’t know. Everything was new
and different than the negative perceptions I had associated with labor in the
past. While I was in pain, it was more manageable than I expected at that
point. Nate called our doula and informed her that we were headed to the
hospital to see if my water had broken.
I remember waiting a short time for the elevator after we
parked the car. However, it was taking too long and we proceeded to the stairs.
I just wanted to keep moving. When we first got to labor and deliver we stood
there for a few minutes before someone helped us. She took us back to a triage
room. She told me to get changed and asked me to provide a urine sample. I
headed straight to the bathroom. While providing a sample, I looked down and
there was blood in my urine. That was my “this is it moment”. I panicked and
called for Nate.
From that point on things began to move really fast. The
pain became much more intense. I wished that I had eaten something that
morning. My hands and face began to go numb. I stayed in the bathroom. Nate
rubbed my back as I began to throw up. I remember telling Nate I couldn’t do it
anymore, that I wanted the epidural. Nate says he recognized the emotional
stages from Bradley Class and he thought I must be getting close. That gave him
the confidence to help talk me through my feelings of doubt. I just kept
thinking I was probably barely into this process and I didn’t know how much more
I could handle. He kept reassuring me that I could do it, and reminded me to
slow my breathing.
Almost an hour had gone by and no one had checked on us.
Nate went out to see what was going on. They were never informed that we were
there. The nurse came in and told me I needed to lie down in the bed so they
could get 20 minutes on the monitor. The thought of lying down sounded
unbearable at this point, and I let them know I felt that way. Once they got me
into the bed I wanted out. I felt the urge to go to the bathroom and I told
them. My midwife decided she wanted to check me. I was 9 cm dilated with just a
little bit of the cervix left.
They wanted to move me to a birthing suite as soon as
possible. Just a few minutes later they wheeled me across the hall and asked me
to transfer beds. I flipped onto all fours into the new bed, and refused to
leave that position. The midwife checked me again and confirmed that I was
fully dilated.
On the next contraction I began to push. I pushed like this
for awhile before trying a side-laying position. At this time our doula rushed
in to join us. She helped me get into the third position that I would
eventually deliver in. I remember pushing being extremely exhausting. I also
remember the amazing support around me. The nurses, midwife, doula and Nate
telling me how great of a job I was doing. It was their encouragement that kept
me going.
Nate says I was comical during pushing. He says I would ask
silly things between contractions like whether or not I was giving myself a
hemorrhoid. He says his face and hands also got tingly at this time. I had
brought a water bottle to the hospital, and I remember he kept offering me
water, but then I could also hear him chugging from it.
I pushed for an hour and one minute. I looked down and
watched Minden come into this world. It was amazing. She was more beautiful
than I could have expected. Then I began to panic as they cut her cord. This
wasn’t in our plan. We wanted her to stay on the cord until it stopped
pulsating. However, she was stunned from a sudden and quick labor and the
pediatric team needed to get her breathing.
Once she was breathing they let me hold her for a few
minutes before taking her to transition. Nate went with her and that gave me
great relief. When I hold her now it still makes me sad that we didn’t get to
have the skin to skin contact that we had planned for immediately following
birth. I wanted that for me, but more importantly for her.
I remember how energized I felt after birth. I just wanted
to get up and go see her. The nurses and midwife were great. They commented on
how well I did. They even said they could tell I had done prenatal yoga. They
made me feel strong and proud of what I had just accomplished. My doula stayed
by my side during this period.
I didn’t get checked into the hospital until after Minden
was born. I remember signing the paper afterwards that says they would be allowed
to use the vacuum or forceps in an emergency situation. I was relieved that it
wasn’t necessary. Not even two hours later I was up and headed to see my baby
girl.
I can confidently say that what we did to prepare in the
weeks before her birth that gave me the ability to give Minden the natural
birth she deserved. The chiropractic adjustments not only gave me relief from
the aches and pains of a growing belly, it also kept Minden in the correct
position and prepared my body for labor. Prenatal yoga allowed me to find my
inner and outer strength. It prepared me not only physically but mentally. Our
doula gave us so much information before and during our birth. She stayed with
me after and kept me informed on everything going on with my baby. She helped
educate me on the hospital processes. She has a great working relationship with
the hospital, and that was very beneficial for us. Finally, our Bradley classes
helped us prepare for a partner coached child birth. It also forced us to think
about my diet, and other aspects we would not have otherwise.
We are so excited and truly blessed to have Minden in our
lives. I am happy we took the steps we needed to achieve the birth we desired.
