pregnancy meltdown

Well, it happened. My first major pregnancy meltdown. The combination of numerous sleepless nights up with heartburn and my hormones gone wild finally got to me.

I wanted to make sure that I wrote this down for my baby girl. So one day when she is pregnant and experiencing something similar to this I can share with her how crazy I was, and she can take comfort in the fact that she is not alone. She is in fact experiencing something very normal.

I don't want to go into too much detail, but it all started with a pizza. On Monday night we really needed to get groceries but neither Nate nor I wanted to do it. We had a coupon for pizza so we decided to go ahead and order in (which we rarely do).

My little brother, Andrew, is living with us for the summer so I called down to his room to see what he would want. His reply was sausage (the one topping I have not been able to stand this entire pregnancy).

My response was a fairly loud and clear no. To which my dear husband said my name in that way that lets me know I better calm down. Next thing I know I am in the bedroom crying about sausage pizzas, nobody caring about how the house looks, being a working mom and somehow 20 minutes later landed on how I will never be pretty ever again. When I reached this point Nate pointed out that maybe I should lay down and rest. My sweet little Coop came in and gave me kisses.

I can look back at it and smile now, but it all seemed very serious at the time. The truth of it is that being a new mom is not only very exciting, but also pretty scary. There are a lot of unknowns that lie ahead of me, and I really struggle with not being in control or having all of the answers. So although I am not proud of how I acted, I think new expecting moms (in fact all moms) deserve a little credit. It's an amazing thing growing a little one inside of your belly, and it is also a lot of hard work. However, I am certain that it will be 100% worth all the craziness in the end.